Before this blog thing runs wild with popularity, I feel compelled to be honest about expectations. I, as a dog, refuse to make any dog-related puns unless completely necessary. This rule is the reason why my first post was not titled “A Ruff Start”. This blog will not let cheap laughs ruin its artistic integrity. I may lick the floor, people’s feet, the underside of a bench, the wall, and piles of dust, but I still have artistic integrity as a writer. Furthermore, this blog is about nothing. My basic thoughts throughout the day are as follows: “Everybody wake up!” “Poo poo poo pee pee poo poo” “Food!” “People food!” “Veda, toy, Veda, ball, VEDA!” “Car noise, dog noise, noise in general!” “I sure am tired” “Noise!…back to sleep” “Everyone’s home! Food, play, sleep!” and repeat. Wow, that sure is a good day. I can’t wait to see what tomorrow holds. Back to my point about this pointless blog. All posts are about what I think is interesting in the moment and they don’t have any underlying message on humanity or anything else. It’s only about having fun because that’s what I Ham!
Proofreading. Not! He’s a dog, people.
My Life as a Ham 
When I read how a Ham day goes, I can feel only one thing…. pure jealousy
Don’t get too excited about my day. I am forced to eat only bits of brown crunchy food and whatever I can scavenge from the floor. I sure do love you though.
Hey Ham,
I respect your strict rules when it comes to artistic integrity. That’s why I was taken aback with your “That’s what I Ham!” comment. Isn’t that a cheap laugh? How is that better than a pun? Is it a pun? I can’t remember what things are that good.
Miss you buddy.
That’s a bit harsh and judgmental. I’m just a little guy trying my best. I Ham what I Ham.